How and When to Tell Your Kids about Sex: A Lifelong Approach to Shaping Your Child’s Sexual Character by Stanton L. JonesWhile this Christian book is not perfect and I dont agree with everything in it, its a wonderful book to get the conversation about sex and open lines of communication started with your children. The two biggest take-always are: start early and talk often (dont just have the talk). There are four companion books for parents and children to read together. Those books state facts and are a jumping off point for talking to your children. The four books are broken into four age appropriate levels of information:
The Story of Me (ages 3-5)
Before I was Born (ages 5-8)
Whats the Big Deal? Why God Cares about Sex (ages 8-11)
Facing the Facts: The Truth about Sex and You (ages 11-14)
Sexuality: What children should learn and when
Does the mere thought of having to explain what sex is to your kids make you break out in cold sweat? The first time I talked to my child about sex my eldest was about six years old then , I used a simple book called The Wonderful Way Babies Are Made to help me get the conversation going. Having a book to introduce the topic was great but guess what, I still felt sweat beads forming on my forehead. Contrary to what people think, conversations about sex encompasses much more than the sex act alone, and needs to be handled age-appropriately. Read on for more ideas and resources. During the pre-school years, the focus is on body awareness and body safety.
There is so much shame surrounding the subject of sex in the culture we live in today. Here are some practical tips for teaching your children about sex:. Rejoice in the wife of your youth. She is a loving deer, a graceful doe. Let her breasts satisfy you always. May you always be captivated by her love.
This guide outlines what children are able to understand at different stages. Beginning a conversation about sexuality early and continuing that conversation as the child grows is the best sex education strategy. Every child is different, but here is a rough guide to what children should be able to understand about sexuality and reproduction at different stages. Toddlers should be able to name all the body parts including the genitals. Using the correct names for body parts will allow them to better communicate any health issues, injuries or sexual abuse. It also helps them understand that these parts are as normal as any others, which promotes self-confidence and a positive body image. Most two-year-olds know the difference between male and female, and can usually figure out if a person is male or female.
Preschoolers: Two to four years old
Growing up, neither of our parents taught us about sex. As a matter of fact, not only did the world teach both of us about sex, neither of us grew up in a Christian household. Can you relate? And it felt so good. We both know that God honored us for making the decision to wait to have sex until after we married and wanted to be sure our children had the chance to do the same. We first started praying these prayers over 18 years ago and we are excited to say that we successfully taught our oldest daughter now 18 all about biblical sex in marriage.
Inside: Research tells us following these 6 guidelines gives children a healthy foundation for an understanding of their sexuality, intimacy, and relationships. Regardless of opinion on public sex education, parents can feel empowered in their ability to create their own sex education in their own home. We have decades of research showing us the positive effects of talking about sex truthfully with our kids early on. Most parents avoid the sex talk with their children like the plague, only coming to the realization that, when they finally do decide to sit down with them, their children have already amassed loads of inaccurate information from far less desirable sources. Avoiding the topic is not preventing our child from learning about sex. It does, however, prevent them from learning accurate information about sex. The Dutch are known for being at the forefront in talking with their children about sex.
Talking about sex may be the single most powerful way you can enter into the lives of your children. Because sex education means more than teaching them the facts of human reproduction. Of all the discussions we have had in our family about sex, probably 95 percent of them have concerned character issues. We talked about how to avoid situations in which you are tempted, how different types of media shape our thoughts in this area, the types of movies to see and avoid, how to respond when someone challenges your convictions, and many other topics. We have found that the issues surrounding human sexuality, such as self-control and obedience to God, are the foundational character qualities every parent wants to build into his teenager.